I’m Not the Glue Anymore

Still a connector — just not the glue

I’m a connector — but I don’t have to be the glue for what doesn’t want to stick

Some people are born connectors.
They sense tension before a word is spoken. They pick up the loose threads, soften sharp edges, and gently draw people toward each other.
I’m one of those people. Maybe you are too.

For a long time, I thought that was my calling: to be the glue.
The glue in a family.
In a church.
In a group of friends.
Not because I thought I was so important, but because I truly longed for peace — and believed in the beauty of connection.

But here’s what I’ve learned (and I’m still learning it every day):
I’m a connector, but I don’t have to be the glue for what doesn’t want to stick.

Sometimes, you keep trying to hold together what’s already drifting apart.
You send one more message.
You try to explain one more time.
You take on the weight of what others won’t carry.
And meanwhile, your soul grows tired. Heavy. Quiet.

Because glue only works when both sides want to hold.

Sometimes, they don’t.
Or maybe… you don’t anymore. And that’s okay.

These days, I’m learning to listen to that inner nudge:
If something causes too much tension, I simply won’t do it anymore.
Not out of stubbornness — but out of love.
Love for others, yes, but also love for myself.

In the church, in my family, and beyond:
I’m done forcing things that don’t fit.
I want to walk in peace — not patch up what doesn’t want to heal.

I’ll always be a connector. That’s part of who I am.
But I no longer want to be the glue for things that fall apart by choice.
That’s not weakness.
That’s growth.
That’s grace.